Matchmaking
by ForeverLilacLies
Summary: Sakura tries to set Kakashi up with Itachi. It doesn't go as expected.


**This is just a quick little oneshot for Itachi's birthday!**

* * *

Sakura Haruno was not to be trifled with. Sakura Haruno knew how to get into a person's head and pull out their spleen through their eyeballs. Don't ask how. Just accept it. Sakura Haruno was just that good. Naruto didn't make up the rules. He just accepted them for what they were. The truth. So one early spring morning when he went to meet up with Team 7, he was unsurprised to see that usual plotting look on her face and when she turned to look at him, he knew he had just been dragged into this without any say.

The things he did for friendship.

Sakura herself was unsure how exactly she came up with the plot. She had awoken early and gone out to enjoy the sunrise over the treetops when she had spotted them. First she recognized her sensei. Kakashi was not an easy man to miss. His ridiculous hair and mask and that lazy body language was recognizable anywhere. He was standing at the ledge of the cliff, hands in pockets, watching the sunrise. It was such a Kakashi thing to do and Sakura should have figured that he enjoyed watching sunrises. However the person he was standing with stumped Sakura for a moment. Then she realized that the other person was Itachi. His hair was in the normal ponytail, but there was something softer about him in this moment. He was relaxed.

It still surprised Sakura how Sasuke-kun and Itachi could look so similar yet so different. She had watched the pair with keen eyes. Kakashi had said something to Itachi who smiled lightly at him and just like that, it was clear in Sakura's mind. The sun came up and all she could see was hearts and sunshine and romance. They would be prefect together. Sakura could see it already. Kakashi flirting and being his usual lazy self, but with a new spring in his step and Itachi smiling more and not so busy with missions and family. They needed each other and Sakura would help them see it.

"Naruto," Sakura began with a sweet tone once Naruto finally arrived at their meeting place. "We're going to be matchmakers."

"For who?" Naruto asked with squinting eyes. He slouched against the side of the bridge while Sakura bemoaned the lack of romance.

"Sensei and Itachi-san! Don't you see how they look at each other?" She asked and Naruto made a face.

"They don't really talk at all. I don't think I've ever seen 'em talk."

"That's because you haven't been paying attention." Sakura calmly informed her less than genius teammate. She was so distracted with setting up this romance that she did not even notice when Sasuke angsted onto the bridge. "Mark my words, Naruto. Kakashi-sensei and Itachi-san will see the light and fall in love. We just have to help them realize their feelings. Those two aren't big on that sort of thing. So we need to help them." Sakura hummed and Sasuke stopped mid-brood to stare at the female.

"What are you going on about?" He asked and Sakura started, finally realizing he was there.

"Oh, Sasuke-kun! I was just...uhhh." Sakura began awkwardly.

"She's trying to set sensei and 'Tachi-nii up." Naruto helpfully inserted himself into the conversation. Sakura scowled, eyebrows narrowing as she turned on Naruto. Sasuke however caught her attention with his own displeased glare. That perverted sensei would be getting nowhere near his beloved Aniki. This woman had to be stopped.

"Haruno. I swear if you try to set that pervert up with my brother, I'll-"

"You'll what?" Sakura barked back, arms crossed over her chest. "Glare at me and angst?"

"Oooooooo." Naruto breathed.

"Dammit." Sasuke turned away. She knew too much...pink she devil. Sakura smirked, knowing she had him beat. She held her hands firmly on her hips and regarded the two boys on her team.

"Love will prevail! Either get on my level or get out of my way." She boasted. Naruto and Sasuke shared uneasy glances.

If there was anyone Sakura could trust for romance it would be her one true rival. Ino was many things, and wise in the way of love was one of them...or at least she was better than Sakura. After training that morning, Sakura made a beeline for the flower shop where she knew Ino would be working. She opened the door, hearing the bell jingle overhead and Ino peered from around the counter, lips pulling into a smile as she spotted the other girl.

"Well well, what are you up to Sakura?" Ino asked, slipping from the desk to approach the other girl. The store was mostly empty and Ino had a stack of magazines lined up. She was no doubt looking forward to the conversation. Sakura explained her goal and asked for her wizened advice on the topic of brining people together. Ino hummed, watching as Sakura firmly explained her mission.

"So you've come to me for help?" She asked, eyebrow high.

"Yes. You would understand." Sakura replied with a hopeful look on her face, bright green eyes imploring. Ino nodded sagely, peering out the window.

"Flowers. We can have flowers delivered to Itachi-san from Kakashi-san." Ino looked around the shop and Sakura nearly clapped her hands in excitement. Of course! Flowers were _perfect_!

"Oh yes!" Sakura gushed. "Maybe these pretty yellow carnations?" She pointed to them, smiling brightly.

"No! no, no no!" Sakura yelped in shock at Ino's explosion. "There is a language to flowers and yellow carnations are rejection! We can't send Itachi rejection flowers!"

"Oh! I didn't know!" Sakura wailed in dismay. A rejection flower? Did those really exist? Ino sighed wearily. Sakura looked around at the flowers, wondering what other secrets she was ignorant to. The blonde reached out and pat Sakura's arm lightly.

"Here, let me make you a bouquet to send." Ino danced around the shop and Sakura watched as she picked several types from different sections of the store. She would eye each with a keen eye before nodding to herself and adding them to the bouquet.

"Here we have variegated tulips. They mean beautiful eyes...and you've seen Itachi-san's eyes. So obviously Kakashi has too. Red camellia, which is burning passion. Gotta have that. Daisies for loyalty and one red rose for love and respect." She held out the colorful arrangement to Sakura who felt fluttery at all the romance. She took the bundle and went to pay for them but Ino waved her off. "Consider it a gift. We need more romance in this village."

"Oh! I couldn't possibly...I-" Sakura babbled out her thanks and Ino slipped a white camellia into Sakura's hair and offered the girl a smile, tapping a slim finger against her nose.

"I'll see you after, okay?" She assured the smaller girl who nodded, thanking Ino.

* * *

"It's the oddest thing." Itachi hummed that night as he sat in his room with his brother. Sasuke turned towards him curiously.

"What is?" He asked, watching as his brother continued to tidy up the room.

"I received a bouquet of flowers from Kakashi-senpai. I never took him for the type to send flowers. I wonder what he wants." Itachi pointed to the flowers and Sasuke was on his feet in an instant. He read the tag, noting it was stamped rather than written. No way to trace it back to anyone it seemed. This had Haruno written all over it. He glared out the window, hands curling into fists. The pink she devil would not succeed.

* * *

Flowers delivered: check.

Kakashi and Itachi in love: Still working on that.

Sakura was still plotting and Sasuke was still brooding. This left Naruto to his own devices which usually ended with him avoiding his friends. Too much drama for him, you know? Sakura had already set out a mariachi band and Sasuke had responded with cold sharp precision and chased them off. Sakura had then tried to have a live poet follow Kakashi, but Kakashi had assumed they were trying to sell him something and had made himself scarce. Somehow Kiba and Shikamru had gotten wind of the whole fiasco and were making bets on who would win between Sasuke and Sakura. Ino had taken it upon herself to act as wingman to Sakura and Sasuke had used the power of guilt and honor to get Naruto to follow him. It would have been much simpler to let Itachi and Kakashi do as they wished, but that wasn't going to happen.

It finally reached a head when Hinata informed Kiba who told Shikamaru who mentioned to Choji who told Ino who told Naruto who blabbed to Sasuke _and_ Sakura that Itachi and Kakashi were both at the village cafe together. So, naturally there was amad diash for the cafe. Sakura knocking Sasuke out of her way to ensure the meeting did not go interrupted and Sasuke latching onto her ankle, prepared to break up whatever was happening. Naruto trailed behind with the rest of Rookie nine, all taking bets now. Sakura flipped the Uchiha over her head and onto his back, knocking the wind out of him with a triumphant roar. In the background Ino nodded mouth pressed into a firm line. The pair burst through the cafe, nearly taking out Genma who was trying to eat his damn soup in peace. They found the table they were looking for and Itachi looked up, face impassive as Kakashi sighed.

"THEY'RE TRYING TO LET THAT PERVERT DEFILE YOU-"

"GIVE LOVE A CHANCE-"

"CAN YOU **PLEASE** MAKE THEM STOP?! I HAVEN'T SLEPT IN THREE DAYS!" Naruto wailed from somewhere out of sight.

Kakashi and Itachi were sitting in the cafe. Itachi held a smoothie in one hand, the other was linked with Kakashi's. The two men looked from the pile of children on the floor to each other. Sakura and Sasuke instantly tried speaking over each other, Sasuke shoving Sakura away while the girl took him into a headlock, neither willing to let the other go. Kakashi slowly pulled his hand away from Itachi's and crossed his arms over his chest, studying his squabbling students with a lifted eyebrow.

"You two would be perfect together!" Sakura called out, elbowing Sasuke in the ribs.

"Don't listen to her, Aniki! She's all forehead and no brains!" Sasuke shot back and in the background, Ino rolled up imaginary sleeves until Choji pulled her back.

"Uhh, guys...I don't know how to say this, but Itachi and I are already together." Kakashi piped up.

"Wait what!?" Both Sasuke and Sakura stopped their arguing to turn to their sensei who shifted, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly. Ino shifted from where she held her own flowers and Shikamaru sighed. "All this work for nothing." He sighed wearily, and turned walking right out of the cafe.

"Yeah, for like four months now." Kakashi confirmed, nodding his head as Itachi hummed in confirmation, still slurping on the smoothie. Sakura and Sasuke stared. Itachi played footsies with Kakashi under the table, smirking lightly at the whole display.

"It's okay guys, they're already doing each other!" Kiba shouted to the rest of Rookie Nine. There were some cries of glee and dismay. Shino shrugged, over the whole thing and Kiba gave chase of Shikamaru to figure out about the money.

"So, you've been dating?" Sasuke pulled himself to his feet as Naruto helped Sakura up. Rookie nine slowly dispersed, leaving just Ino and Team 7 behind.

"Yes." Itachi replied, still slurping and looking well at ease. Sasuke looked as if Itachi had just said he had slaughtered their whole family just for the lulz. He stepped back, hand over his heart. Naruto lifted his eyes to the ceiling. Damn Uchihas'.

"So it's over then?" He asked. "We're done here? I can go eat now?"

"Yeah, go away." Kakashi waved them off, settling back down to reclaim Itachi's hand. Naruto cheered in glee and grabbed Sasuke's shoulder. Sasuke glared at Kakashi as if preparing to kill him. Sakura nearly swooned as she watched the pair hold hands. She was right! They _were_ perfect together!

"Sakura, can we go now? Let them enjoy their date?" Ino nudged the girl's arm and she slowly nodded, tearing her arms away from the wonderful scene in front of her.

"Yeah, let's go." She looked to the blonde who grinned at her, blue eyes dazzling in the cafe lighting.

"Oh thank god." Ino declared and shoved the bouquet of red carnations she had been holding into Sakura's arms.


End file.
